Programmers Are a Bunch of Monkeys…Literally

By Deane Barker on August 6, 2003

Primate Programming Inc: They say that if you sat a thousand monkeys at a thousand typewriters for a thousand years, they would eventually turn out Shakespeare. Maybe, but could they get a Java servlet to compile?

“Welcome. Primate Programming Inc. is dedicated to the advancement and gainful employment of non-human great apes within the United States information technology sector. We are the pioneer in Primate Programming (PP) worldwide.”

Can you believe some people are angry about this? The founder of the Iowa Primate Learning Sanctuary had this to say.

“‘Our mission is sanctuary, research and education. We take that very seriously, and we don’t want there to be any confusion,’”

Deeps breaths, people. Deep breaths. (Being from South Dakota, I’m trying hard not to throw in a Iowa joke here. I’m pretty sure even printing it would trigger an automatic DOS attack from