Car vs. Boat vs Bike

By Deane Barker on November 29, 2005

Car vs Boat vs Bike – Google Video: Major, major gearhead porn here. It’s a video of a superbike, a Formula One car, and an offshore powerboat going head-to-head for a quarter mile. It looks like they managed to find a runway next to a canal of some kind.

The boat gets to start at full speed for some reason, which is good but it’s completely irrelevant anyway — 75 m.p.h. just isn’t going to cut it in this company. They should have used a drag boat.

The car — driven by Jenson Button, no less — has a clutch problem in the first run, but in the second and third, it just smokes the bike completely. The bike has serious wheelie problems — it can’t go to full power or it’ll flip over backwards.

What’s cool is that I’ve always wondered how fast a Formula One or Champ Car would run a quarter-mile. Nine seconds, it turns out.

The link on the page says “,” but that domain is squatted and the narrator sounds susiciously like the guy from Top Gear, of which we’ve gushed before. Can someone confirm this is the case?

What This Links To


  1. I can confirm that the guy narrating is Tiff Needell who did indeed present Top Gear but now presents a rival program on Channel 5 (in the UK).
    This is what happened.

    In 1987, Jon Bentley became the producer of Top Gear, and proceeded to bring in new presenters, such as Jeremy Clarkson, Tiff Needell and Quentin Wilson, and also to shift the approach of the show to a more hard hitting critical view of the motor industry. This seemed to fit well with the feel of the time and Top Gear became immensely popular.

    It took a while for other channels to leap onto the Top Gear bandwagon but with the launch of car shows on ITV and channel 4, and waning viewing figures Clarkson and Bentley left the show. It struggled on for a year or two before the BBC announced that it would be taken off air for an overhaul.

    A month after this Channel 5 announced they would be making a VERY similar program, produced by Top Gear’s old presenter Jon Bentley, and featuring most of the recently made redundant Top Gear presenters, including Needell and Wilson.

    Not to be outdone, a month before Fifth Gear was due to air, BBC announced that Top Gear would be returning with a new format, and best of all with Jeremy Clarkson presenting.

    So in short, Clarkson and Producer leave Top Gear, show flops. Producer sets up rival show with most of the old presenters, minus the legendary Clarkson. BBC rethinks cancelling show and relaunches with Clarkson at the helm, and wipes the floor with other show. Top Gear is great, Fifth Gear is tacky rubbish. Except for the boat, car, bike thing.

    And now after writing this, it should finally be fully downloaded and I can go and watch it.

  2. Well duh. A purpose built Forumula One is gonna beat a production based bike. Those care guy are so insecure about their sexuality that they’re always finding ways to stack comparisons like this against the bikes.

  3. A purpose built Forumula One is gonna beat a production based bike.

    It looked like it was race-prepped, but I didn’t look closely enough, I guess.

    Those care guy are so insecure about their sexuality that they’re always finding ways to stack comparisons like this against the bikes.

    So the car guys are insecure? Not the guys who insist on riding around with a big, powerful…thing between their legs?

    Dude, I don’t think there’s anything on God’s green Earth more phallic than a sport bike. It’s like a big penis with a seat.

  4. FAIR???? They Raced a production Honda CBR 1000 RR Fire Blade against a Proper F-1 Car!! Excuse me?? am I missing something here??? Are they comparing likes with likes??? The bike was race prepared but its a PRODUCTION BIKE if they wanna race they should race a GP Bike, Some facts for you to eat! A GP bike can reach speeds of 167MPH in just 7.2 sec FLAT!! you do the maths!! I bet they know this and wont dare to race them! they spend millions of dollars on their F1 cars, how would they feel if a BIKE can beat a state of the art car??? lolzz you figure!!!I know on a close circuit bike cant match F1 car and thats because the technological advancements and money spent on F1 Cars but hey we are talking about a drag race here!! and ahh boat with a speed of 75 mph??? lmao they should have raced a drag boat! Fair or not you figure!

  5. Looooool now thats a race…Thats nothing guys……. if they would try MotoGp bike, of course Rossis bike or Ducati or Honda…F1 would lose for sure and I agree they should also try against a drag boat….Now that would be very interesting, wouldnt be?

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