Pay no mind that you are currently on the internet, but, the internet has crashed.
I hope you have backups, because the government doesn’t.
Which leads to the next question, what would you do without the internet?
via The Onion
That was absolutely brilliant. I loved the bit with Tony Snow.
In the two weeks after moving here, without the Internet–because the cable company cannot simply switch an existing account to another (new) account without a complete removal and reinstallation of equipment–I found a hobby: bicycling. Plus it's exercise. However, the Internet does make it more interesting, with various podcasts and other audio downloads. And the ability to track down affordable tools and parts.
If other places are anything like where I work, if word got out that the Internet had crashed, it probably would crash, what with everybody getting online to see if it's true.